Friday, July 20, 2012

Free Fred Willard!

Today's installment of "Stupid Fuckin' Bullshit in the News" is about another well-known man joining Pee Wee Herman on the list of Masturbation Martyrs.

Fred Willard - a man who, quite scandalously, ENJOYS PLAYING WITH HIS PENIS, was arrested in an adult movie theater for public lewdness.

OMG - Won't somebody think of the children?!

Oh - wait a minute - it was an adult movie theater so there were, by definition, NO CHILDREN involved. Unlike some priests and sports coaches, Fred was in the company of a few other adults doing exactly what you're supposed to do in an adult theater - watching some porn and jerking off.

Don't the LA police have some actual CRIME they could be fighting?

The really sad thing is that PBS affiliate station WGBH in Boston has announced that Fred is to be erased from their 'Market Warriors' series. I'm going to call them to tell them that I'm disappointed and hope they'll change their position - especially since Fred hasn't been tried or convicted of anything and was, from my reading, not even breaking the law.

If you want to give WGBH a call to tell them something similar their number is 617-300-5400 - Monday through Friday, 9am to 5pm EST - let'em know that we love Fred even more now that we know that he likes to jerk off with a group of men ;)

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